Friday, May 23, 2014

Chaos makes me stronger

Some days I feel creatively drained. My mind is blank. It is frustrating when something you are good at seems to have abandoned you. I love to write. I am good at it. Usually.....

The last couple of days every time I sit down to try and write I am not sure what I want to say. My ego has been out of the closet more often than usual with his angry attitude and rude comments. So all I want to do is write about negative things.

I guess if I was a professional writer it would be called writers block. I imagine it happens in all areas, perhaps it is my spirit guides letting me know I need to turn my attention to other things in my life at the moment. And in the overload that is my life my Ego has stepped forward in self preservation, in his never ending in your face pushy way,  to save me from my dangerous life.

Yes I guess I have a lot going on right now. We are moving to a new house in a week & renovating a room at the shop (New paint and flooring), on top of all the regular things we have to do everyday. Plus it is spring and nice out and we want to get as much quiet time at the motorhome at our summer spot as possible. We have to drive and pick up some furniture we are purchasing for our new house today after work. Tomorrow we want to go out and spend a couple days at the summer spot. We still have to pack next week because we move on Thursday. We want to put flooring down in the remodelled room at the shop, while working in between remodelling AND next weekend I have booked myself into a Goddess Spiritual Retreat starting on Friday so we have to have all this done by next Friday. Haha no pressure.

So it stands to reason I am feeling a bit disconnected. And as a result Ego is out of the closet in full regalia cheering me on, and speaking through my mouth with his unique angry snarky tone. I can see him in my mind excitedly and happily dancing around while throwing out rude comments about everything like a demented little leprechaun.   I have to gently, or non to gently if needed, relegate him back to his supporting role in the back seat to do what he is supposed to do and wait for a 'real' life threatening situation to come forward to help me out with.

So I ground myself, ask my spirit guides and guardian angels for strength to focus on one minute, one hour, one day at a time until I have once again worked my way out of the craziness I have orchestrated for myself and have a chance to breath a sigh and relax. Of course I realize I obviously Love the craziness and chaos I create in my life because I do it over and over and over again. Is it a good thing? I do not know. However what does not kill me makes me stronger and I do love the sense of accomplishment I get from surviving and conquering the chaos when it is all said and done. I will add it to the list of things I want to take some time to sit down, and meditate on it when I get a free minute later on.

Huh in hindsight I guess I do have something positive to write. Thank you my spirit guides.

Lesson learned: 
Open your mind and let you spirit guides help you and they are always there to do so!

Todays Affirmation:

Today I will be calm and focused even in the centre of chaos. 

Love and Light

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